The Worst Week of My Life

To cut this story short - as most of you know I have already had the dreaded word Cancer and last Sunday I found another lump in my other breast and thought it was probably just a cyst or something. After having mamograms and scans done they told me it was a tumour so I had to have a biopsy to see it is was cancerous. They took four biopsies and sent them off to pathology and I have been waiting a whole week for the news. I only found out late this afternoon that the results came back "benign" so I am over the moon.
But it has been a long involved story/wait over the past week and lets say I have been stressed to the max and last night before I found out about the results I caved big time and ate non-stop for five hours. I don't know if I have wrecked everything for July comp - more than likely I would say so being so close. The funny thing is that I am so happy about being alive at the moment that having my super bit binge just seems so insignificant.
Anyway I am sure when I come back down off cloud nine I will realise what I have done so I guess I will see where all the fat and sugar is sitting in the next couple of days and decide where I go and what I do from here. But I am just over the moon with the results I can't stop smiling.
I haven't read anyone's blogs for a few days - so will catch up in the next few days. My trainer will probably have me doing triple cardio so I might not have time :)
Live with Passion
Kimmy

Things were going to smoothly

Well I have a major challenge happening at the moment - hopefully it will be short lived and I will be back blogging as normal soon but will probably be off the air for about a week.
I have missed two days of training but am hoping to get them done today and tomorrow.
Had a major emotional controlled binge (3oo calories of cholcoate) last night but over all because it was controlled I feel so much better - I just decided to allow myself the emotional sensation of that treat and I don't even feel bad. So I am over it now and slapped myself around and totally 100% back on track this morning. I know I should not have done this so close to comp especially chocolate but I was very impressed with my control even if it was totally wrong :)
Anyway it made me feel better and if that is all that happens to get me slightly off track then I will be happy - I have been so good and I under the circumstances I really felt that I deserved that - but hey I am only making excuses now - so bare with me - I just need the loving at the moment :)
Can't get into the nitty gritty detail but just needed to express my feelings - so bare with me.
Everyone else be good and keep training hard and I will be back in the land of the living real soon - I hope.

Live with Passion
Kimmy

ALL LOOKING GOOD

Sent some photos thru to my coach and he said he was very happy with my progress so far - so that is making me feel a little bit better.
I remember the first time I had to take a photo when I did my first challenge with Sue and I took the photo and died because in real life I didn't think I looked that bad LOL
Now when I took my photo and sent it off my coach says it looks good and I think I look fat and floppy with no muscle and need lots of work - It is so funny.
Let me tell you I need 7 weeks and 2 days of serious work to get me standing up there on that stage so I don't make a fool of myslef - I am so looking forward to the experience but so scared and nervous all at the same time.
My food has been excellent and training spot on and the cardio as well so I am hoping this will continue. I always have plan A, B and C because as we know this is the real world and there is always something that happens to challenge us.
Well that challenge must be coming soon so I am going to be ready for it :)
Love everyones comments and positive support and vibes around here - you are all so wonderful to have as friends.
Well must go and do some work before my staff catch me playing around on the internet :)

Live with Passion
kimmy

Quick update

Well my bad head has passed and just have the remainder which is just a normal headache this morning, so that is good.
I got dressed up in one of my new business suits to make me feel better this morning and headed off to the on-site auction. We had lots of people there and lots of bidding and we sold the property for some really nice vendors to some beautiful purchasers - so that was fantastic.

I am all bloated and scale has gone up a kilo this morning but I am hoping it is just from all the pill popping that I have been doing with this bad head over the past 3 days.

My trainer has told me to take 3 days off - that is good - so I have all weekend to catch up with work and home and then I am flying to Sydney on Monday so will be good not to have to stress about gettting my exerciwse in. I will then take photos etc on Tuesday and send thru all my stats to my trainer.

I am getting very anxious about comp in 8 weeks and having all those doubts that everyone talks about - I just don't know how my body is going to get to the stage it needs to be at in 8 weeks.

Anyway I will just keep doing what I am told and be happy with my results cause nothing is going to stop me from stepping on that stage so I will be doing my darnest to get my body where it has to be. I always think I should be doing more than I am but I just need to listen to my trainer cause as we know what most people do is usually train too much and eat too little. Well I am definitely not training too much (well at the moment - I might be complaining soon:) and I am definitely not eating too little (yes I can hear you all giggling - I know I will be complaining about not having enough energy or food real soon) Anyway I will just keep doing my plan and hope it all just happens right at the end:)

Love reading everyones blogs and really love getting comments back - it is like another little family, very supportive and always there for one another.

Keep up the great work everyone and keep Living with Passion

PS A BIG FINGERS CROSSED AND BEST WISHES AND LOTS OF POSITIVE VIBES FLYING ACROSS AUSTRALIA TO PERTH TODAY - GOOD LUCK RAE. KIMMY

PSS HELLO TO MY BUDDY - ALI :)

Motivation

Bab Headache today

Have had a bad head all day today - started last night and has not eased up - I think I am high on pain killers.
I still went to the gym and did my back and bis and 50 minutes on the elliptical machine - so training done but was hard to find the motivation to keep going but I did so I am happy about that.
Have had a very busy day and have to go to a 7:00am breakfast again tomorrow so I think I will go and take some more drugs and fall into bed.
I just went to have my myoplex lite and realised that they were all at work - oh well I don't really need it anyway - too sick to worry tonight :)
Be good and keep Living with Passion
kimmy

Kimmy Heather and Margie at Phat Camp

QUOTE FOR THURSDAY

"Picture yourself vividly as winning and that alone will contribute immeasurably to success. Great living starts with a picture, held in your imagination, of what you would like to do or be."
Harry Emerson Fosdick
1878-1969, Minister

Flexibility

It is important to plan carefully, and it is just as
important to be flexible. Success and achievement usually do
not end up coming about in exactly the way you planned.

While it is vital to have a realistic, workable method for
getting from here to there, remember to keep in mind that
the plan is not the goal. To reach the goal, you may need to
relinquish the original plan, or at least certain parts of
the plan.

Just because something goes wrong along the way and the plan
doesn't work, does not mean that the goal is unreachable. It
simply signals to you that it's time to be more flexible.

Flexibility means being committed to your plan without being
completely dependent on it. Flexibility means being open to
the numerous other options available to you.

For anything you want to attain, there are many ways to get
there. When one path becomes blocked, don't turn back.

Instead, look for a workable detour and get busy moving
again. You may soon find that the going is even better than
you could have imagined.

Ralph Marston

Shoulders Tris and Abs plus Elliptical

Had a good day at the gym today - shoulders, tris and abs and then 50 minutes on the elliptical Machine.

I am feeling really good but the scale is not moving much but I have been following my plan 100% so I am feeling good - Meals on time, getting enough sleep etc so I am happy and I can feel things changing even if it is too slow for my liking and not registering in numbers :).

I will be taking photos at the end of the week as planned and sending to my trainer and he will let me know what he thinks and we will see if we need to alter the diet etc.

I have been feeling quite drained this past week - not sure if it is the recent change in the diet or what. Still managing ok so not complaining - I did snap at one of my staff members today and that is not like me so I hope I don't keep getting worse or I will have no staff left :)

Be Good and Live with Passion
Kimmy Australia

Mothers Day - Potato Bake - Icecream and apple pie

Had a great day. Davo gave me a beautiful bunch of flowers. Olivia updated my lambswool slippers and a great big mug and teabag canister for the office. We had lunch at home with my mum-in-law, my daughter and her friend Paul, Claudia, Kim myself and later David and Jess and Jenny and Blayne arrived. It was a lovely day and I enjoyed every moment of it. I called over to see my mum earlier in the morning before she went to bowls at the Macquarie Club with some of her friends.

I had to update my journal with food I was craving - it now has added to it POTATO BAKE, HOME MAKE RISSOLES, APPLE PIE ICECREAM AND CREAM, TRIPLE DECKER PEPPERMINT CHOCOLATE.

I had my chicken and veges and green tea - 100% on plan - but ghee I was craving that potato bake :)

My daughter came to UPW with me last year and just loved it and purchased another ticket for this year but cannot make it this year so I am trying to talk my son and girlfriend into coming along - hope they decide to say yes. This is the last time Anthony Robbins is going to be Live in Australia.

Hope all the mums had a great day and look forward to catching up with everyone during the week.

Live with Passion - Kimmy Australia

WHERE YOUR MIND IS

Where your mind is
+++++++++++++++++++
What do you think about your current situation? What do you

think about the possibilities that are available to you at

this moment?

What you think has a direct and undeniable connection to

what you do. So it pays to keep your mind focused on the

highest and the best.

Where your mind is right now is where your life will soon

be. The thousands of thoughts that you think each day

provide the stage upon which you perform.

The outer performance is driven by the inner thoughts.

Thoughts of confidence, effectiveness, strength and positive

achievement will lead to truly great performances.

Consider all the things you say to yourself as every day

goes along. Each one is an opportunity for you to direct

your mind in precisely the way you choose.

Use all your thoughts, the little ones, the big ones, and

all the rest, to put your mind in a positive, empowering

place. Enjoy the journey as your great thoughts lead you

surely and steadily to greatness.

Ralph Marston

NO ENERGY

I changed my training time today so I could go to a funeral and it really seemed to affect my strength. Still had a good chest and tri's workout even though I struggled to lift the same or similar weight to the week before and 50 minutes on the elliptical machine. One of my meals was a bit late as the funeral I went to had a 2 hour church service - I thought it would be about an hour so I was one hour out with one of my meals.

The funeral was of a very well known businessman - he had 14 children - beautiful family.

I am feeling very low on energy today but very positvie.

We are down to one digit weeks now - 9 weeks to comp from tomorrow.

Tried on my other posing suit and can now at least get it on even if everything bulges so that is good.

Love this blog and all the positive people.

Live with Passion
Kimmy Australia

Your feelings

Your feelings
+++++++++++++++++++

How do you want to feel today? That's exactly the way you can
feel.

Do you want to feel frustrated, annoyed, upset, discouraged
and angry? Then you will find in this day plenty of excuses
for feeling all those negative emotions.

Or would you prefer to feel alive, empowered, enthusiastic,
passionate and joyful? If so, as you go through the day
there will be opportunities for such coming from every
direction.

The great thing is that you are never a prisoner of
circumstance when it comes to how you feel. Whatever may or
may not be happening around you, you can choose to feel
exactly the way you want to feel.

Yes, you could choose to feel lousy and then blame your
feelings on the terrible hand you've been dealt. But you
would be missing out on a great opportunity, the opportunity
of experiencing the best that this day has to offer.

Instead, decide to take responsibility for your own feelings
and then aim those feelings in a positive, empowering
direction. And whatever else may happen, you're sure to have
a great, valuable day filled with life.

Ralph Marston

One step at a time

Well it has been a busy week.

I have had 20 sun spots burt off my face and have to have one cut out on my face and on cut out on my leg. So not looking the prettiest at the moment LOL.

Did shoulders and tris Monday and Legs yesterday. Have done cardio Mond, Tues and today - now doing 50 minutes on the elliptical machine - I am really enjoying it actually - first for me.

Work has been busy and just talked by way out of a conference in Queensland 10 days before comp. I have to go for one night but I can handle that. I am also off to Sydney on the 22nd but my travelling this year has really quitened down so that is good.

I plan to take a week off week after comp so I can spend some time alone with my hubby so I am really looking forward to that.

My diet plan is going well although my weight or body fat is still sitting firm - I am hoping I will wake up one moring and it will just all be gone LOL.

I have to start practicing my posing - it is a MUST.

I am feeling really peckish tonight so will go and attach the sugar free gum and have a cup of green tea.

Everyone be good and Live with Passion
Kimmy

What an awesome picture of Heather Kimmy and Jen at PHAT camp Melbourne

Phat Camp

Margie and I had a great time at Phat Camp and meet up with lots of our friends from last year. Learnt lots of new exercises and enjoyed all the talk sessions and the inspirational stories from everyone that attended.

I practiced posing in my glass slippers an have lots of practice to do - I am very clumsy and have a long way to go.

I got lots of hints for competing in July and it has motivated me to stay 100% on plan to achieve my goal.

Jen and Heather were beautiful and very inspiring, motivational, entertaining and encouraging. We love them both heaps and can't wait to come back again next year.

We are sitting at the airport - our plane has been delayed two hours so we are cathing up on our posing techniques in the Qantas Club.

Margie and I had a unit with Susie, Ali, Kerry and we all had a lovely girlie time.

Can't wait to get back to the gym because there is only 10 weeks and 5 days until the July Comp.

Will catch up more when we get home.

Live with Passion - Kimmy Australia